I've Got The Golden Ticket.......

................................and my delivering OB is Willy Wonka. I swear I will try to keep this short & sweet, but my OB appt. today was so strange & wacky, it's worth sharing. Even I am sitting here not for sure that I can accurately put it into words.

So we start off with the NST. My belly is so much larger than last week they had a hard time getting the straps around me. I fall asleep before the nurse even leaves the room, and just drift in and out of consciousness while they go back and forth taking the test strips to the OB.

Finally it's over to the Ob side. Normal drill getting ready. Strip from the waist down, etc., and she leaves. I again just lay down & go to sleep (don't worry - I wrapped my sheet around my bare hiney really, really tight). I'm guessing an hour and a half passed, but I have no idea. I think the lack of food is finally getting to me as I can't function, focus, anything for the past two days.

I wake up to a very pale, redheaded man rubbing my cheek with his face about 2 inches from mine. Of coure, I'm disoriented and freaking out because I've been asleep so hard, and he whispers to me "Thank you for continuing the human race, brave mama." And this totally puts me over the edge. It was like having found a leprechaun that is concerned with underpopulation in your bedroom. I'm staring, probably drooling, and totally sputtering. I can think of nothing to say; have no idea who this man is, where I'm at, why I'm there, or where my pants went.

He helps me sit up, and begins reviewing my chart while he introduces himself. He's another member of the team, the head of it actually, and says he has been following my case since it came in. He had requested from day one to be the one to deliver me, and apologized profusely for not having had the opportunity to meet me before this point. I'm still totally confused, by the way, and I must have looked it because he hugs me, all the while telling me he doesn't normally hug patients (so why start now?).

He goes over the info, and it was such an amazing experience. HE UNDERSTOOD what I was going through. He said it was a miracle we'd made it this far; he said he was proud of me and that I had gone farther than most women in my position would've (you mean I had an option??). He says he is unhappy with where the c-section is scheduled, it needs to be sooner, but said they did it that way because that is one day he is on to deliver and he considered my case to be of "pet interest" to him (meow, I guess?).

Long story short (not that short, I can see), he asks me if I'm busy later today. He would like to do the section this afternoon. I about fell over. BUT today is Lily's birthday and our family isn't here yet so DH couldn't be there so I asked for an extension (that was so hard - I just wanted to scream, yes, yes!). He gave me his personal home phone and pager. He said from this moment, the decision is mine. Day or night, call the number and he will be waiting for me at the OR personally. He expects and would like to hear from me by Monday, but he is leaving the decision up to me. He reminds me that my water breaking is a very bad thing, and tells me after a quick check that my cervix is completely pliable (for whatever that means!). He hugs me again and is gone.

It all just feels surreal. I'm still groggy and out of it, but it actually brought me to tears to have someone fully understand that I am at a point where I can no longer digest food, walk normally, breathe normally or even do the most basic everyday things for my family because my nerves keep giving out and dropping me to my knees. He UNDERSTOOD .

I wish this was funny, or witty or anything else. I am just so *** hungry, tired and disoriented that I don't have it in me. I can say though, that I have to wonder if the whole "Thanks for continuing the human race" thing was his way of A)encouraging job security or B) he reviewed the amount of money my case has brought into his clinic and he just called and set up arrangements to pick up his new BMW.