Disputing 30 Days

I have a lot of children. I am past the 30 day return policy on all of them. Somehow that doesn't seem fair; I think a 30 year return policy is better. As babies they make huge messes, as toddlers they throw huge fits, as teenagers they cost huge amounts of money and in their twenties they cause huge amounts of stress and almost debilitating disappointment.

All of that times 5 in my case. Somehow it just doesn't seem right. I am taking the rest of the day off and the first child who loses the current round of the Quiet Game that I am making them play will go to the pound.