Why Mackenzie Will Not Give My Eulogy

Setting the scene: Mom is making out the menu for next week so she can create a grocery list. Mackenzie enters the room with a sweater from Mom's closet..................

Mom: (writing)
Mon: chicken & dumplings
Tue: jambalaya
Wed: leftovers or hot sandwich
Thur:......

Kenzie: Why don't you wear this? Are you too fat for it?

Mom: (writing)
Mon: chicken & dumpings dirt
Tue: jambalaya mud
Wed: leftovers or hot sandwich poo..........
Thur:........

Note To Family: I am never "too fat" for anything. I just occasionally go on religious hiatuses from everything I own.