Peace On Earth & Goodwill Toward (quiet) Man

Peace on earth. There is never going to be peace on earth (actually there will be, but it's a roundabout process as described below). And I will tell you why. Because religious people are filled with stupid questions. That's why.

One of the grand past times of the church goers, is to parade around their buildings discussing in great detail the grand many ridiculous things they plan to "ask G-d" when they "get to Heaven". This boggles the mind. For this scenario, let's say we see the prophecies fulfilled in this lifetime. We are going to see a majority of the world's population slaughtered &/or maimed, a total transformation of the natural world as we know it, and a supernatural battle that will end in such a massacre that blood will be horse bridle deep for miles, and these silly people think that they are going to tap Yeshua on the shoulder and ask Him why the sky is blue as opposed to green, or some other such preposterous nonsense. Haven't these people ever heard of Google? Hmm?

My theory on this is that this is why it says that Yeshua will rule with a rod of iron. I think He will use it to smack people who ask stupid questions directly on their melon and thus bring about peace on earth.

I Am Caesar Sose!

I'm still rather alive, I quite assure you. I am going through my email and schtuff this afternoon, so to everyone I owe info & smoochies, watch for it to arrive sometime today. I am a tad late, but I am learning to embrace this aspect of my personality and so should you. I have no idea why you should embrace it, as it doesn't benefit anyone at all really, but pop psychology says that I'm OK and I wouldn't kick pop psychology out of bed for eating cheese and crackers.

This is the last day of our Hanukkah celebrations. I have to say that having a holiday last for 8 days is absolutely hilarious. I now fully comprehend Adam Sandler's quip (from the Hanukkah song) "Instead of one day of presents, we get 8 craaaazy nights -hee hee". Granted, we didn't do presents every night, and twice Michael had to work late, but overall I'd say we pulled it off rather well. Well enough, in fact, that our neighbor benevolently brought us pork sausage yesterday evening. I hadn't the heart to tell him about kosher, and instead thanked him profusely. With a straight face even. I've got this whole modest, non conceited thing totally handled. I am so unvain that I absolutely amaze myself. I am the least self absorbed person I know. In fact just the other day I was letting someone listen to me tell them about how all I do is think of other people first. Cause that's how I roll, all thoughtful and stuff. I am the queen of charity. I am the role model for modern society and, let's face it, the uncredited backbone of all advanced civilizations and............

Anyway, now we get to start preparations for Christmas. I objected, but was overruled in the court of Michael, which is not a particularly fair court, by the way, and ended my articulate and well planned objections with judicial threats like "I have a whole bag of shhshshshsh with your name on it". On the bright side, though, I now get to make a "gimme" list, which I have been working on all morning. It's amazing how the bar of expectations limbos wildly out of control the poorer you get. For example: I started out with a Kitchen Aid counter mixer, then realized that the was not going to happen. I then lowered the poll to this shirt from Target, but did the math and realized that I couldn't really tell the children that for Christmas Santa brought the whole family that shirt. I then lowered the bar to a used bath bubble maker from the thrift store, but it sold, and I finally settled on used lottery tickets and a half drank bottle of wine that's already in the fridge. The above of course is a total exaggeration and I suppose that I must admit that there really is no truth to it at all (except wanting to the mixer and the shirt). I'm afraid that my conscience gets to me during the holidays regarding these things, but I promise to return to being a conscienceless liar come January.